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A preacher, a rabbi and an atheist walk into a bar. As they sat down, the bartender walks up to the first and says, “What’ll you have bud?”
The preacher says, “Give me a shot of the strongest you’ve got. Despite all my devotion and fervent prayer, I just found out my wife has been cheating on me with my brother. My son just came out of the closet and is quitting college to move with his boyfriend to San Francisco. My car’s transmission need’s replacing and I have a raging case of hemorrhoids. I’m going to sit here and pray”
The bartender moves on to the next and asks again, “What’ll you have?”
The rabbi says, “Give me double what ever he is having. After many years of serving the Lord, my wife is leaving me after 35 years of marriage because she found out I’ve been seeing prostitutes. My daughter has joined a cult. I’m being investigated for embezzling from my synagogue and I’ve been peeing needles for three days. I need to just sit here and pray“
The bartender gets to the last and asks again, “What’ll it be?”
The atheist says, “Give me a glass of champagne! My wife and I are celebrating our 20th anniversary next week. My twins have been offered full scholarships to Yale, Harvard and Duke. I just sold my company for millions and I just ran a marathon yesterday.”
Finally the bartender stops, looks at the atheist then over to the preacher and rabbi and says,” God, those guys are miserable, why are you doing so well?”
Suddenly there is a clap of thunder, the skies open up and a booming voice comes from above, “Because he doesn’t bother me all the time.”
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